Punchkins ~ Funny Sayings Plushies

This bear just dropped a stinky load and doesn’t give a sh*t who knows it. He’s the type of guy who spends 30 minutes on the toilet and doesn’t even feel crappy about making you late for dinner with your friends. He’s the ideal...

Have you herd? This little plushie is lactose intolerant! That’s right, cow’s milk gets his bowels mooving right along, straight through to his dairy-air. It’s udderly ridiculous the havoc dairy can cause on the body, and he gets that! His distraught expression,dangly legs, and...

Don’t get salty, but this plushie is knot interested in your lies. He only wants the facts, not the twisted story you’ve baked up. He likes his truths just like he likes his pretzels: straight up. (Well, he really prefers a hot, soft-baked pretzel,...

We’re not talking about temperature here! The perfect plushie for your dad or dad friend– beer, khakis, and socks with sandals not included.

Why choose squats over spuds? This french fry plushie knows there’s no comparison! This plushie is perfect for any carb lover! 

Imposter syndrome doesn’t stand a chance against this purse plushie’s positive attitude. It's soft fabric, weighted base, and dangling legs make it the perfect desktop cheerleader to get you through those long video meetings

This gal knows guys come and go, but carbs are forever! Display this little dose of girl power at work, home, or give it to your friend going through a messy breakup (we know he didn’t deserve her).

This Punchkin’s got 99 problems and anxie-tea is literally all of them. Is she too hot? Is she too cold? Did she brew long enough? What if nobody likes her or drinks her? Or worse, reheats her ten times, still doesn’t drink her, and...

Happy wife, happy life! Right, fellas? This plushie knows that the (not so) secret to a long and happy marriage is keeping your wife happy! NOT! She knows it takes more than that. She knows your lady needs a helpful, funny, and fully-committed partner—and...

  OMG Becky, look at those buns. They’re so soft. This tasty-looking plushie is the perfect mix of yummy and punny, making it perfect for any burger fan.

This Punchkin likes it thick and spicy—and we’re not just talking about her books. When it comes to her reading material, the smuttier, the better. If a book isn’t giving GOYKASMCLAGLS vibes, she isn’t interested. She needs bad boys, safe words, and trigger warnings....

This plushie loves her men tall, dark, and fictional. Let’s be honest, men in the real world aren’t going to cut it! She craves spice and is looking for the type of man you’ll only find on BookTok. One who’s attentive, protective, and will...

This Punchkin loves historical romance novels. I mean, have you read the Bridgerton series? (Have you seen the TV series? *fans self*) Her loins burn for that kind of passion. She dreams of falling in love with a man who will tell her, “You’re...

This Punchkin likes her thrillers to be dark and twisted. If they don’t come with a trigger warning, she isn’t interested. She wants to squirm. She wants to be grossed out by the author’s descriptive narrative. She needs a story that plays with her...

This Punchkin is OBSESSED with true crime. But he doesn’t like cold cases; he wants them solved! He’s seen, read, and listened to so much true crime content that he’s practically a detective now. Like any true crime junkie, he knows three important facts:...

Espresso your feelings for coffee with this plushie! Even if you haven’t had your first cup yet, the little plushie is sure to bring a smile to your face.

This plushie will grab your heart write from the start. She’s looking for her person, and you’re just her type. She’ll love you forever if you letter. She’s the perfect gift for the one who holds the key to your heart. Product dimensions: 6in X 6in X 4in

Sure, you or someone you know might be going through some tough times, but those difficulties pale compared to the hard work and grueling effort required to maintain a respectable amount of cheesiness. Sit this deliciously designed plush grilled cheese out to inspire you...

Let’s taco ‘bout how cute this plushie is! With its weighted base and dangling legs, this is the taco that will finally stay upright.

This plushie is known for rolling with the PUNches. His friends would say he’s soy awesome and rice to everyone he meets. He’d maki the perfect gift for any sushi lover.